Golf Jokes: The Funniest Jokes About Golf

Do you know what kind of jokes make people playing golf laugh? If not, then you’ve come to the right place. Here, we will be exploring some funny and entertaining golf jokes that are sure to bring a smile to everyone’s face! We’ll be looking at everything from lighthearted puns and anecdotes all the way up to more irreverent gags designed for seasoned golfers. So grab your clubs and let’s get started on this tee-rific journey in humour of golf jokes!

100 Best Golf Jokes

  1. Q: What did the golfer say when he sliced his shot?

A: “Fore!”

  1. Q: Why did the golfer buy two pairs of pants?

A: In case he got a hole in one!

  1. Q: How do you make a small fortune playing golf?

A: Start with a large one!

  1. Q: What did the golfer say after hitting his drive out-of-bounds?

A: “There’s always another hole to play!” 

  1. Q: Why don’t golfers go broke on their vacations?

A: Because they never get past the 9th hole!

  1. Q: What is a golfer’s favorite day of the week?

A: Par-tee Friday!

  1. Q: Why did the golfer pack an extra pair of shoes? 

A: In case he got a hole in two!

  1. Q: How can you tell when a golfer is ready to tee off? 

A: He stands up straight and starts singing “Fore! I say fore, fore, fore…”

  1. Q: How do you make four golfers laugh at once?

A: Tell them a joke about putting!

  1. Q: What did one golf ball say to the other?

A: “Let’s get out of here, this isn’t our hole!”

  1. Q: How do you make a golfer laugh on the 19th hole? 

A: Tell him a joke about golfers getting lost in the woods!

  1. Q: What did the golf pro say when his student asked for help with their putting game?

A: “It’s just like riding a bike – if you don’t keep pedaling, you’ll never get anywhere!”

  1. Q: What did one golf club say to another? 

A: “If it was any more fun we’d be illegal!”

  1. Q: What did the golfer say when his friend asked for a club recommendation?

A: “Get yourself one that’s long, strong and hits the ball far!”

  1. Q: Why don’t golfers get hurt walking on cart paths? 

A: Because they watch where they’re going!

  1. Q: What did the golf pro say to his student who was struggling with their game? 

A: “Don’t worry – there’s always a few bad holes in every round!”

  1. Q: Why did the golfer take two sandwiches out onto the course? 

A: He wanted something to eat between birdies!

  1. Q: What did the golfer say when he got a hole-in-one? 

A: “That’s one in the bag!”

  1. Q: What kind of animal do golfers fear most on the course? 

A: The dreaded sandbunny!

  1. Q: How can you tell when a golfer has been lying about their game? 

A: They have divots in their stories! 

  1. Q: Why did the golfer bring a spare putter to the course?

A: In case he got into a sand trap!

  1. Q: What did one golf ball say to the other after they both missed their putts?

A: “Guess we’re in the same boat now!”

  1. Q: What did the golfer say when his friend asked him how his game was going? 

A: “It’s par for the course!”

  1. Q: What do you call a golfer who always takes practice swings but never hits any shots? 

A: A windmill!

  1. Q: What do you call a golfer who never misses his putts? 

A: A miracle worker!

  1. Q: Why did the golfer wear two pairs of shoes?

A: So he had a spare pair in case he got a hole in one!

  1. Q: How can you tell when someone is an excellent golfer? 

A: They always have their ball under par!

  1. Q: What did the golf cart driver say to his passengers after they reached the 18th hole?

A: “Golf’s over, folks – time to go home!”

  1. Q: Why was the golfer so excited about getting a new set of clubs?

A: He finally got to play with a full bag!

  1. Q: What did the golfer say when his friend asked him what he liked best about golf? 

A: “It’s a great way to get outside and enjoy some fresh air!”

  1. Q: How do you make sure your golf game is on par?

A: Keep your head down and concentrate!

  1. Q: What did the golfer use to try and improve his drive? 

A: A bigger tee!

  1. Q: Why did the golfer put ice in his golf bag? 

A: So he could keep his clubs chilled.

  1. Q: Why was the golfer so upset after a bad round? 

A: He lost his ball in the rough!

  1. Q: What did the golf pro say to encourage his student?

A: “Don’t worry, you can always try again tomorrow!”

  1. Q: What did the golfer say when he tried to putt from off the green? 

A: “It looks like I’m going to have to chip this one in!”

  1. Q: How can you tell when a golfer is getting better at their game? 

A: They hit fewer balls into water hazards and sand traps!

  1. Q: What did the golfer say when it started raining during his round? 

A: “Looks like I might have to call in a rain check!”

  1. Q: Why was the golfer so proud of himself after his round? 

A: He finished with a birdie on the last hole!

  1. Q: What did one golf ball say to the other after they were hit off the tee?

A: “Well, at least we got to see the world!”

  1. Q: Why did the golfer hit his tee shot so far off to the side? 

A: He was trying to find a new fairway!

  1. Q: What do you call a golfer who only hits half the fairway? 

A: A divot master!

  1. Q: What did one golf club say to the other at the end of a long day on the course? 

A: “That felt like par for the course!”

  1. Q: What did the golfer always tell himself before every swing?

A: “Take it easy – slow and steady wins the game!”

  1. Q: What did the golfer say when his friend asked him why he was so excited about getting a new putter? 

A: “It’s my secret weapon for sinking those long putts!”

  1. Q: What did the golf ball say after it was hit out of bounds?

A: “Well, that’s one way to get back in the game!”

  1. Q: Why didn’t the golfer want to finish his round early? 

A: He wanted to make sure he got a full eighteen holes in!

  1. Q: How can you tell when a golfer has had too much to drink on the course?  

A: They start hitting their ball in the rough!

  1. Q: What did one golf club say to the other on a rainy day? 

A: “Looks like we’re stuck inside today!”

  1. Q: What did the golfer say when his friend asked him why he was so determined to make it around the course?

A: “I never give up – I just keep swinging until I get it right!”

  1. Q: What did the golfer say when his ball got stuck in a sand trap? 

A: “That’s why they call it a hazard!”

  1. Q: What did the golfer say after he made an incredible shot over a water hazard?

A: “I guess I just gotta have faith!”

  1. Q: Why did the golfer hit his ball into the woods twice on one hole? 

A: He was trying to find his way out of the trees!

  1. Q: How can you tell when someone is getting better at golf? 

A: They start making more pars and birdies instead of bogies!

  1. Q: What did the golfer say when his friend asked him why he was so excited to finish a round?

A: “It’s time to take a victory lap around the course!”

  1. Q: Why did the golfer hit his ball over the green on the 18th hole? 

A: He was trying to get it as close as possible to the pin for one last shot at glory!

  1. Q: What did the golfer do when his ball landed in a sand trap? 

A: He tried to dig it out with his club!

  1. Q: What did the golf pro say to encourage her student after a bad round?

A: “Don’t worry, you can always get back on track tomorrow!”

  1. Q: Why was the golfer so happy after making a long putt? 

A: He finally made par or better on that hole!

  1. Q: What did one golf ball say to the other as they were flying off the tee? 

A: “Hold on tight – this is going to be a wild ride!”

We hope these golf jokes have brought a smile to your face! Whether you’re an avid golfer or appreciate the occasional pun, we hope these bring some lightheartedness and fun into your game. Now get out there and hit the links with a sense of humour!

Best Golf Jokes Stories

Below are some of the best golf jokes stories that I can find:

  1. Two golfers were out on the course one day. After a while, one of them says to the other: “You know, I think this is the prettiest golf course I’ve ever seen!”

The other golfer looks at him and says: “Well, I don’t know about its beauty, but it sure is long!”

  1. A golfer was playing a round of golf with his friend and came to the 18th tee box. He took out his driver and swung hard, only to send the ball sailing into the woods. He sighed and said: “It looks like I’m going to have to take a drop here.”

His friend smirked and replied: “Looks like you’ll be taking a drop for the entire round!”

  1. A golfer was out on the course with his friends one day and came to a long par-5 hole. He pulled out his driver and took an almighty swing, only to send the ball soaring straight into a water hazard. He was about to take his penalty stroke when his friend piped up: “Hey! That’s not fair – that’s a stroke and distance penalty!”

The golfer looked at him incredulously and said: “How do you figure? I hit it miles away from the hole!”

His friend smirked and replied: “Yes, but you still had to get wet!”

  1. A golfer was playing a round of golf with his friends and came to a short par-3. He took out his 5 iron and took an almighty swing, only to send the ball flying straight into a sand trap. His friend shook his head in disbelief and said: “You know, you’d have been better off just taking your 3 wood!”

The golfer looked at him incredulously and replied: “Yeah, maybe – but this way I get to practice my sand game!”

  1. A golfer was out on the course one day and came to a difficult hole that required an accurate drive in order to avoid hazardous water hazards on either side. He took out his driver and nervously teed up, only to send the ball soaring into the water on the left. He sighed and said: “That’s why they call it a hazard!”

His friend looked at him sympathetically and replied: “Yeah, but at least you don’t have to pay for a new golf ball – that’s one benefit of playing with an old one!”

  1. A golfer was out on the course one day and came to a long par-5. He pulled out his driver and took an almighty swing, only to send the ball slicing off into the woods. His friend shook his head in disbelief and said: “That was a terrible shot – what were you thinking?”

The golfer looked at him and replied: “I was thinking that I might get lucky and find the ball!”

  1. A golfer was playing a round of golf with his friend and came to a long par-4. He pulled out his driver, teed up and took an almighty swing, only to send the ball flying off into the woods in the distance. His friend shook his head in disbelief and said: “That was quite a drive – did you mean to do that?”

The golfer smiled sheepishly and replied: “Well, no…but it felt good when I hit it!”

  1. Two golfers were playing a round of golf and came to a long par-5 hole. One of the golfers pulled out his driver and took a mighty swing, only to send the ball flying off into the woods in the distance. The other golfer shook his head in disbelief and said: “Wow – that was quite a drive! Where did you learn to hit like that?”

The golfer smiled sheepishly and replied: “At the driving range – but I don’t always hit it that far!”

  1. A golfer was out on the course one day with his friend. He teed up for one shot, only to send the ball slicing into some nearby bushes. His friend looked at him and said: “You know, if you had taken a more controlled swing, that would have been an easy shot!”

The golfer smiled and replied: “Yes, but then I wouldn’t have gotten to practice my recovery shots!”

  1. A golfer was playing a round of golf with his friend and came to a long par-5 hole. He pulled out his driver and took an almighty swing, only to send the ball flying off into the woods in the distance. He sighed and said: “Well, there goes my 3 wood stroke advantage!”

His friend shook his head in disbelief and said: “Maybe, but at least you’ll get to practice your wood-shaping skills!”

The golfer smiled and replied: “That’s true – I guess I’ll take what I can get.”

The pair laughed as they continued their round, and the golfer was reminded of the old adage: “It’s better to be lucky than good!”

With these golf jokes in mind, he continued to make the most of every shot, no matter how challenging. After all, there are always lessons to be learned in golf.

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How to create golf jokes

When writing golf jokes, the key is to focus on the humorous aspects of the game. Consider the common situations that golfers face out on the course — for instance, hitting an errant shot or getting stuck in a sand trap — and look at them from a humorous perspective. Ask yourself what could be funny about these situations, and use that as your starting point.

In addition to jokes, you can also craft humorous stories about golfers’ experiences on the course. Start with a setting and fill it in with characters, dialogue, and details related to the game of golf. For example, you could have two friends out on the course discussing a particularly challenging hole — what kinds of things do they say to each other, and how does the story end?

By tapping into the humorous aspects of the game, your stories and jokes will be sure to entertain your friends and family. So don’t hesitate — get out there on the course and start creating golf jokes today!

Common Mistakes to avoid when making golf jokes

  1. Not knowing your audience: When making golf jokes, it’s important to make sure you understand the people you’re telling them to. If they don’t know much about the game, then any specific references will go over their heads.
  2. Relying too heavily on puns and wordplay: Puns can be funny, but it’s important to not rely too heavily on them. Not everyone will appreciate the puns, and they can quickly become stale if overdone.
  3. Getting too serious: Golf is a serious game, but your jokes don’t have to be! Keep it lighthearted and use humor to point out the quirks or follies of the game.
  4. Not taking into account cultural differences: If you’re telling jokes to an international crowd, be mindful of any cultural references that could be offensive or misunderstood.
  5. Going for shock value: Don’t try too hard to be edgy or outrageous with your jokes – it won’t end well. Keep it clean and in good taste, and your jokes will be all the more appreciated.

By avoiding these common mistakes, you can ensure that your golf jokes are a hit with everyone! Have fun out there on the course – and keep laughing!

>>> See more: Funny Golf Jokes Top 10 Best!

FAQs about Golf jokes

What are some golf sayings?

Some popular golf sayings include: “Golf is a game of honor,” “A bad day on the golf course beats a good day at work,” and “Drive for show, putt for dough.”

What chant do golf fans use?

The popular golf chant “Get in the hole!” is often used by fans to cheer on their favorite players.

Conclusion on Golf jokes

Golf jokes are a great way to inject some humor into the game. By understanding their audience, avoiding common mistakes, and keeping it clean, golfers can create hilarious jokes that will be sure to get some laughs. So go ahead and have fun creating your own golf jokes – it’s sure to make your next round all the more fun!

Broad Run Golf is a golf blog dedicated to helping golfers of all levels improve their game. Our blog covers everything from beginner tips to advanced tournament strategy.